Parenting Difficult Children

Parenting Difficult Children

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Parenting Help Parenting Help Tips   photo credit: LaurenV.

Not all children are easy to parent. The reasons for a child being difficult vary from personality type to mental health problems that cause a child to be hard to deal with for a parent. Parenting is never easy and with a difficult child the bar is set even higher for the parent.

Children that are difficult to parent include children with Attention Deficit Disorder with Hyperactivity (ADHD), Oppositional Defiance Disorder ( ODD), or children with Conduct Disorders (CD). These children act rougher around the edges and make parenting a huge child. One cannot practice ordinary parenting techniques with a child that will not listen or do what they are told to do. This causes stress on the parents who feel ineffective in raising their own children.

Children can have conflicting personalities with their parents. A child can have a difficult temperament and not want to do what the parent asks them to do. This is not based on a mental health diagnosis just that the child is predisposed to acting a certain way based on the personality or temperament the child was born with.

There are effective ways to deal with children that are difficult to parent. The child may act out due to being called out for their negative behavior. The child learns if I act out in a negative way I get attention and can basically get away with this even if I do get punished I can do it again and get away with it. When the child learns this technique they act in maladaptive ways to get that attention. A parent needs to praise the child for when the child acts in a positive manner and do what they can to avoid negative behavior if minor. If negative behavior is inappropriate it does need to be punished and dealt with. Once a child starts getting attention for positive behavior they may be more likely to act in a positive and healthy manner. If a child feels they only get negative attention make sure to give a large prize when the child acts in a positive way so they learn positive behavior gets them better results in life.

Parents can use positive statements to make sure the child is aware that positive behaviors are recognized. Parents often do not realize that they are prompting the child for negative behaviors and he is feeling good for getting attention off of that. The child once again acts in a maladaptive way because at least they are getting attention even if it is not for good reasons. Once the negative behavior is ignored the child learns they cannot get attention for negative. Never ignore behavior that is dangerous to self or others. When a child acts in that way make sure to get appropriate referrals and do what you can to keep the child safe. The main idea of effectively parenting a difficult child is to praise the good behavior at a higher degree than the negative behavior.

Author: ParentingMaven

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